Adonis Diaries

Archive for August 8th, 2009

I visited my “Motherland” once


I read Ulysses once; it was all ancient Greek.

All languages are suitable for writing poems:

Poems are meant to express the spirit of the Land;

Long before languages were created or codified.

Samuel Butler demonstrated that Ulysses was written by a woman,

A young woman and single; I like that better;

It is more convincing.


Butler confirmed that Ulysses’ trip was around Sicily.

Seven years to tour Sicily is irrelevant.

Years in ancient times were measured by seasons.

The shorter year was winter; the longer one was the extended long dry season.


One systematic mind split the differences in moon rotations.

Another mathematical mind worshiped number three.

His enemy preferred the symmetrical number four.

Years kept shifting in length.


It was a time of confusion and rare standards.

It was a time of total freedom of ignorance

Mainly for the “free men”.

Slaves were redundant and obeyed the will of their masters.

They still do on a larger scales, number and ignominy.

The masters are mostly regrouped in “Secret Clubs” of free men;

Sometimes in veto power nations around a United Nation.


I visited my “Motherland” once.

I returned to my City-State of Itaca once.

I had no Penelope there waiting for me:

I would never care for a dumb witch waiting for a war man.

I have never been a war man: I fled the war zone for reasons.


I visited my “Motherland” once.

I visited my “Motherland” with my new family.

I called up my exiled friends to join me.

I didn’t care to face little men and little souls;

Petrified and perched on mountain peaks.

I toured my motherland solely with my family like a tourist:

Nature and natural phenomena are romantic and truer to my origins.


The children loved my motherland;

They had plenty of fun with super energetic and fun children.

They climbed trees, jumped walls and cliffs.

They played war battles with sticks;

On land, seas, and around the galaxies.

Fire crackers a go-go; makeshift guns and swords flailing around.

Many wounds and scars to mend;

Barely missing their folks; the tamed ones.

It was a dangerous habit experiencing natural chaos among the kids’ world.

I won’t allow my children this extravagant climate;

They won’t visit my motherland as long as in protection.


I visited my “Motherland” once.

I fled as quickly as the airport was re-opened.

I boarded the ships of my adoptive nation;

Evacuating its citizens from a worn torn dysfunctional society.


I visited my “Motherland” once.

Nobody cared to ask me about my life in my “adoptive” society.

They blabbered about stories and anecdotes of the dead and mostly the dying.

They recounted of newer generations, totally irrelevant to me.

Nobody cared to ask how much I suffered and struggled to survive.

Everybody mocked the caring soul who ventured to know the new me.


I visited my “Motherland” once.

I am currently living in a standardized society,

Highly organized and administered for just the free people:

A society every bit the dream of racist Plato in his Republic.


I visited with trepidation:

I had been given a medal of honor in my adoptive society.

I kept on my high white horse and barely mingled.

They insisted on raising me on shoulders and necks.

I lamely fought this uncalled for barbaric show of substituted glory.

Another medal of honor was attached on my lapel.

The officials never cared to investigate if I was proud of my origin.

I was a sample of men worthy of the motherland’s origin.



I visited my “Motherland” once.

I visited with hesitation; I am back almost broke financially.

A life of learning and struggles is irrelevant.

I kept my silence, wrapped in mysteries.

I created my own island.

With inexistent public transportations

It is so easy and comfortable creating islands;

Alongside islands of communities.

I returned for good to my island.


Many poets toured the world for inspirations.

They returned to keep silent.

The world was too gruesome to laud humanity;

Miserable beings were no inspirations for chants and songs.

Pablo Neruda was also frustrated and lived in solitude abroad.

He clawed to his roots, the toiling and brave workers.

His “Canto general” was a culmination of the spirit recounting its origins;

Of dirt, mud, forests, rivers, sand, wind, wilderness, and the survival of man.

Neruda returned to chant the dignity of South Americana.


All languages are suitable for writing poems and the best ones.

It is the spirit of the Land that chants through the soul.

No need to be ashamed of traditions and customs;

All civilizations had almost similar traditions and customs.

Cultures that banished theirs for the sake of modernity

Are not bearable communities for the living.

Cultures that banished theirs for the sake of modernity

Transferred them to exclusive clubs, secretive associations,

The guardians of the customs and traditions

To rule, govern, and safeguard the continuity of the “Free elected Men”

Economy of Sobriety (August 1, 2009)


            There is a growing political economics trend for substituting the traditional steady growth and productivity policies into an economy of sobriety.  The Slow Food and Slow Cities movements along with many European communities exercising self autonomy in the economic policies of their districts are practicing on a smaller scale the concept of “living better for less”.

            The latest economic downturn is re-confirming that the previous policies are hindrance to global resolutions for global problems.  The middle class has increased three folds within les than two decades.  China and India have added over 300 millions to the 200 millions in the USA, Europe and Japan.  This quickly increasing middle class is demanding equal standards of living as in the USA simply because they can afford to purchase the same consumer goods for their comfort and are doing it.  World resources in minerals, oil, and wood are depleting and no longer accessible to sustain the current rate of consumption.

            Regular people are not interested in the concept of “faster is better” or “more performing is better”; they would rather fly safely at more affordable fees; they would rather that customs and airport regulations quicken the pace and alleviate faster the hassle. The regular people would rather have moderately performing equipment that last longer and that are more robust under less than standard conditions in the developed nations. Regular people cannot afford to re-invest for products considered obsolete within a couple of years.  Regular people would rather not to have to repaint or maintain their plumbing and electrical lines frequently.

            Regular people would rather have potable water running on schedule; power utilities providing electricity less irregularly and increased rate for the luxury families of high consumption.  Regular people want public transportation arriving on schedule, accessible, and available in cities and in rural areas.  Regular people are not that interested in caviar and luxury items; they need flour, rice, sugar, and seasonal vegetables and fruits marketed locally and not exported overseas.

            Regular people need a wider network of public libraries and public schools.  Regular people want the teachers to be paid right to be retained and compete with private expensive private schools. Regular people need preventive health institutions.

            The industrial nations have got to support sustainable economies in Africa, Latin America, and in the Middle East and desist from mass exploitation of natural resources and human miseries.  Kuwait, Qatar, and Libya are already investing billions in agricultural businesses in Africa; they are renting lands for 99 years and hiring thousands of Africans in jobs they are proficient in and within their own States.

            There is definitely an anthropological crisis; the traditional growth policies are uneconomical, anti-social, and anti-ecological.  Decentralized economies serving restricted regions are more sustainable and are solicited by citizens. Institutions have to be revamped in that direction and up-down laws are no longer cherished. In fact, less restrictive local laws are the best recourse to taming the monster of global totalitarianism in the making.

            Catastrophic crisis are not teaching anything in behavioral change: they simply increase the level of fear, anxiety, and apathy. Continuing in the same trend is tantamount of letting this monster of totalitarianism starting sniffing around for another round of human calamities.

            Most probably totalitarian regimes, established in order to control outbursts and uneasiness, will mushroom in industrialized States because 1) they can afford these kinds of institutions, 2) they have already the sophisticated and all encompassing control institutions, and 3) they have practiced it several times in many nations within the last decades.  Germany, Japan, and the Soviet Union experienced it efficiently.  France applied it to spread its public secular system of education in order to unify its nation. The USA applied it during the two Administrations of George W. Bush.

            Currently, China is the most effective totalitarian regime.  Millions of workers are transferred and displaced by a simple order of the politburo; millions succumb to eugenic practices on simple obscure laws; millions die in mining accidents and famine; gigantic dams are disturbing millions of people without recourse or participation by the citizens.

            The third world states will always enshrine dictators, state political parties, and oligarchies but they will never afford totalitarian regimes for lack of sustainable institutions.  The best you might expect of third world states is organized chaos and periodic clamping down on dissidents.  There will be time when the “industrialized citizens” will opt to immigrate to Third World States and live in sobriety just to recapture the taste of freedom and liberty.

King Raja Yoga: religious philosophy; (August 6, 2009)

Note: I have posted a detailed description of the 3-day retreat that I attended in June 2007. This post is a re-edited version focusing simply on the lectures and my comments.

William makes it a point not to give me advance notice for trips or for this free three days retreat of the King Raja Yoga members in the Palace of Mir Amine, close to the town of Beit-El Din in Lebanon.

We were supposed to leave at night, but William changed the departure to 4 p.m. We drove off around 4:45 and it was very hot and William never stopped perspiring, even with the car air condition on.  We took the exit to Deir Al Kamar which was 15 km off the main highway exit, going south, and we headed toward Beit El Dine.  We arrived at 7 p.m. just in time for the first session of the retreat.

The palace of Mir Amine is a very ancient Prince residence from the 18th century and it was totally renovated to become a five star hotel; it is huge and well kept outside. I was under the impression that this palace, just on the top of the Palace of Emir Beshir II that used to be the summer residence of Lebanon Presidents of the Republic before the civil war, predated in construction but I found out that it was built by a son of Emir Bashir the second.

On the first session I sat down on a chair and stared at a rectangular orange picture with a white dot in the center. Anna, the head of the group of raja yoga in Lebanon, spoke softly and we broke off for dinner at 7:30 p.m.  It was a satisfying vegetarian diner of soup, salad, pasta, and sweet in the vast dining room with arcades.

We regrouped at 8:30 p.m. and introduced ourselves and offered the reasons for coming.  I said that I had the time, I felt bored with my life and that I enjoy the company of William.

First day of the Raja Yoga retreat

We met at 9:30 a.m. for the morning session.  Dr. Prashant, a surgeon of the nose and ears by practice, was the lecturer for the retreat; he talked till past 11:10 a.m.

Lecture #1:  The subject was that once we cross the ignorance line between liking and wanting for possession then insecurity is increased and we are on the path of unhappiness.  When we just like then we are in the position of trustee, guest, master, observer, and free to enjoy our life.  When we reach the want state then we increase the number of our ego in identities, we become very insecure and we try to possess more items as backups to our security and we are slaves to material things.  Dr. Prashant said that security attainment means love, peace, and happiness. Security can be attained through soul consciousness, detachment from involvement; the purpose is to free the mind from desires.

We had a break from 11:15 to 11:45 and regrouped from 11:45 to 2:05.

Lecture #2:  Dr. Prashant described addiction to cigarette for unnaturally increasing the serotonin chemical in our blood stream and then when the level of serotonin drops then it drops below the natural level and we need to smoke more cigarettes to palliate the increased deficiency. Dr. Prashant was very much involved in convincing us from eliminating addiction to TV, radio, music, information, communication, and anything that modern days hook us to.

The third session was at 4 p.m. and the topic was about type A and B individuals.

Lecture #3:  Type A is very insecure, wants more and quickly, has to do several things simultaneously, achieve quickly short term objectives because they usually have a 7 folds higher risk of heart attacks and strokes than type B.

During the break I lighted a cigarette and was heading toward the swimming pool away from the crowd when Anna stopped me and said that I better be very discreet smoking because many are trying to quit.  I told her that I am smoking in the fresh air and I was just walking further from where those supposed quitters are assembled. Actually, two of those who decided to throw away their boxes kept borrowing cigarettes from me throughout the day and evening such as Michael who lived 7 years in New York City and the audio-visual technician who did a good job.

Lecture #4:  We met for the last session of the day around 7 p.m. and the lecture was of how the relationship between slaves and masters are formed.  Dr. Prashant said in every relationship such as marriages or mothers and sons then the one who take the initiative to increase the expectations and desires of the other partner becomes the slave because the other partner was offered the potentials to act and behave as master.  Thus, if you cannot learn to detach yourself from emotions and passions and desires then you are doomed to become a slave fulfilling the expectations and desires of others. The more you are detached the freer you are.

I asked Dr. Prashant that here in Lebanon we have learned to detach ourselves from the desires to have continuous electricity, clean water, safe environment and true democracy through a huge mismanagement in our society; thus, does that mean that we have earned our freedom, that the Lebanese people have become the masters and our politicians the slaves? Dr. Prashant nodded but did not comment as if my concerns did not concern him.  There were many persons who expressed their dissatisfied to my question and their noises of hooo demonstrated that the audience has identified the party pooper, the angriest person among them.

After 9 p.m. we watched a silent movie about religions and mass work by people sitting side by side by the hundred to do chain work and the traffic in crowded cities and pictures of genocides in Cambodia and rituals in Africa; the misery and herd behavior of human conditions and restlessness.  I could identify the countries but I figured that at least this good movie should have informed the viewer to the locations.  Anna stopped the movie around 10 p.m. so that it would be continued next evening.

Michael borrowed a cigarette from me because Dr.Prashant convinced him to through away his box of cigarettes and he told me that he thinks Anna might have been Hitler in her past life.  I smiled to myself because I had sensed that many of those who have mastered the “spiritual energy” are control freaks; I imagined Dr. Prashant as happy as a clam, or the perfect administrator sitting behind a desk and fine tuning the most efficient way to control the masses and totally detached of passions.

Silence Day (optional); June 23, 2007

During breakfast we enjoyed practicing silence and played the part by signing to people on our table but as the day progressed and individuals felt like asking questions during the lectures then the vow of silence broke down, to my displeasure. Any thing optional is welcomed opportunity but hardly applied. People are too weak to resist mass pressure for conformity.

Lecture #5:  Dr. Prashant first lecture of the day was about the levels of consciousness, the PARAS (precious) and the PATTHAR (stone) which are Sanskrit terms.  Since life is a drama played out by props or actors wearing masks and the real director is the observer then individuals have to strive to reach Paras and learn to se the big picture, the subtle eternity, the global view of beauty and the general knowledge.  The Patthas consciousness is gross, small, have a partial view of eternity, he lingers in the pettiness and ugliness of materialism and seeks specialization.  Dr. Prashant focused on the hundred of identities that we define ourselves with such as our nose, wife, clothes, car, professors, and other things that form our personality and become our serious enemies.  Every addiction and desire is an element of our identity and to reach Paras we have to overcome every element of our Ego through the process of not thinking of it for three days so that the devil or Ravan is weakened, starved and then shrinks. 

Dr. Prashant went on saying that we might win over our enemies if we succeed in maintaining a detached emotion from desires. He gave us the example of the one who killed John Lennon; the killer of John loved every thing that John did and represented and he emulated him so thoroughly that he thought that he is John Lennon; thus, there was no need for two John Lennon.

Lecture #6:   Back to the second session around 11:45 a.m. and I sat on a pillow by the wide opened windows. I barely listened to Dr. Prashant ancient Buddhist stories.  Dr. Prashant talked about Sita, Ram, Ravan (the devil), Maya (the mediator) while I kept writing my diary and closing my eyes to focus on my breathing.  I asked whether Sanjeevan represented the knowledge of the rules of the game “Razz” and then what could be the age range to draw the line of ignorance.  As usual the answers were fuzzy at best if he deigned to answer.

Nancy was in charge of translating to Sanaa in the back row and it must be a hard task and I wouldn’t rule out that Nancy was telling Sanaa her own story and interpretations.

Lecture #7:   At 5 p.m. Dr. Prashant talked about children remembering their past lives and also retaining physical marks when death is brutal, like hanging or stabbing and also they keep former ailments.  He said that 60% of those brutally murdered remember that they enjoyed a higher social class.  People with multiple personalities, or several souls, then when a personality takes over, the colors of the eyes may change, scars may disappear and illnesses vary.  Rich people when they die, their last impression is that they lost their fortunes and everything material and that they are poor; the consequences is that in their next life they start with the psychic of being poor.  Dr. Prashant told a story about an 8 year-old boy who refused to be corrected by his mother when learning English and Dr. Prashant interpreted that behavior on account that the boy must have been an English professor of literature.

In the evening we resumed the movie of last night and saw a section of reincarnation testimonies and the movie “The book of the dead” which is the process that Osiris went through after his body died.

That day we had four newcomers and three had left the “experience”.  George has decided to leave the retreat this evening and William attempted to discourage him; he told George an anecdote and a real life story to convince George to stay to the finish.  William told George that he practiced modern dance for two months but quit and didn’t participate in the show; then when he saw the finished product when it was fully operational then it made sense and was beautiful; then when he heard the applause the dancers received from the audience then he realized that he made a mistake not to push to the end and participate in the whole experience.  William said that since then he decided to finish any task that he undertook (he has yet to finish his architecture final project, being delayed for years).

The anecdote of William was about a father asking his four sons to visit a tree, each one at a different season, and when the father and the sons gathered and told their impressions about the trip and the tree then story was different and the whole meaning was beautiful when the whole is taken on.  All William’s attempts didn’t work and George left

Last day of the retreat (Sunday, June 24, 2007)

Lecture #8:  The first lecture session started at 9:30 and it was about the six spiritual levels such as Brahmin (knowledge, simplicity, and service to community), Deity (happiness), Warrior (courage), Merchant (comfort), Shudra (laziness and indulgence), and Demonic (sorrow).  All the time I was meditating with my eyes closed because I was not interested in the talk.

Then I realized that the six levels represent the cast system in India and the discrimination that millions of Indians have suffered through the centuries based on these theological divisions.  I felt furious and commented energetically and heatedly that the lecturer was trying to give spiritual content to these discriminating classes, totally political inadmissible, and told him that he is using terms that are politically incorrect and covering them with spiritual meanings.  I offered that it would be more decent to change the terms and not support the religious cast system in India which is providing power control to the Buddhist hierarchy.

The audience was implicitly in favor of my comment but stunned and was wondering why I am always attacking the lecturer who usually never responds and resumes his lecture as if what I said is none of the business of King Yoga doctrine.

Lecture #9:  We had another lecture session which ended at 1:15. Dr.Prashant explained that Maya is the assistant to Ravan and the advisor to Sita; Maya represents the person that says: “later, it is difficult, you are weak, it is a process”; she provides excuses, and raise doubts. Sanjeevani is the consciousness that can revive the dead, helps with knowledge, and bring back consciousness. Vinash forces are capable of removing the ego elements that are identified with our personality.  He talked about the age of decadence and satisfaction of the senses that carry the seeds of destruction during the period of peace following major wars.  We have to reach Sati Yoga or the age of truth or what is known by the Golden Age.

Lecture #10:  The last lecture session started at 3:15. Around 4:15 we gathered outside beneath a tree and everyone was asked to express his opinion about the benefits that he might have acquired from the retreat.

It was the usual routine of compliments and then I took the floor and said: “I discovered that I am still a tough cookie because I attended all the sessions for 15 hours a day and managed to feel active and not tired by managing my health and controlling my spiritual well being. (Many people got tired or sick or depressed and failed to continue attending the lecture sessions).  I said that I miss the poetry of Shakespeare when he declared that life is a stage and we are the actors in this drama.  I said that the codification of the doctrine of raja yoga has removed any poetry to their understanding of the drama staged in life and that I will be missing the weaknesses and emotions of people if I have to abide by king yoga theology.  I said that I sincerely believe that Raja Yoga is very efficient to remove insecurity at the personal level but society would be cold and very inhuman.”

Most comments were followed by encouraging applause except mine.  After a while I raised my hand and people started the oh, oh, expecting another direct talk and I said: “I just raised my hand because I missed the reaction of the oh, oh.  I said that I feel practically closer to the concept of Raja Yoga than many because my daily life is pretty much detached and that is why I never receive applause.”

After this session everyone got up and got a piece of chocolate wrapped in nuts and palm fruit from the lecturer; Drazulla handed the Truth Cards, supposedly at random.  My card said: “Faithful, loyal, and true to my word.  I am steadfast in seeing things through.”  Then we said farewell and got email addresses and phone numbers and hugged each others.

I asked Giselle whether she uses modern techniques for studying aura of people and she said that Farouk is the specialist. Farouk said the modern technique might correlate with the personal expertise but not as efficiently; he said that I have a huge aura but it is not reflected in my face; he said that I am the type that is willing to trade a stanza of poetry to a bagful of gold and roam the world after my love if I chanced to fall in love.  I said maybe that is why I am detaching myself so that I would not succumb to that foolishness. (Farouk is polite and a sweet talker)

We drove off around 6:30 p.m. Anna had already left and I failed to thank her.  On our way William asked me: “7ebayt?” (Did you like?).  I wondered what he meant by “Did you love” and he said “Did you like?” and I said I did to cut it short.  William was exhausted and his knees hurt and we arrived around 10:30.




August 2009

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