Adonis Diaries

Archive for October 18th, 2011

“I am what I am”? What that mean?
Virginia Satir (American psychologist and Educator, 1916-1988) wrote: “I am Me. In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me. Everything that comes out of me is authentically mine, because I alone chose it — I own everything...”
I have read this quote in the About of a reader who subscribed to my blog. The About resumes:
“My body, my feelings, my mouth, my voice, all my actions, whether they be to others or myself. I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears. I own my triumphs and successes, all my failures and mistakes. Because I own all of me, I can become intimately acquainted with me. By so doing, I can love me and be friendly with all my parts. I know there are aspects about myself that puzzle me, and other aspects that I do not know — but as long as I am friendly and loving to myself, I can courageously and hopefully look for solutions to the puzzles and ways to find out more about me.
However I look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever I think and feel at a given moment in time is authentically me. If later some parts of how I looked, sounded, thought, and felt turn out to be unfitting, I can discard that which is unfitting, keep the rest, and invent something new for that which I discarded.
I can see, hear, feel, think, say, and do. I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive, and to make sense and order out of the world of people and things outside of me.
I own me, and therefore, I can engineer me. I am me, and I am Okay.”
I am not sure if the entire About is from Virginia Satir, but I felt my chest compressing and suffocating: Do all these things belong to me? 
Am I responsible for all these potentials and the duty to care for them?
Shouldn’t liberal capitalist systems ease up a few of the burdens off my shoulders and offer me a few affordable social facilities?
I read a post on notesby.me titled “That’s how I am. I can’t do anything about it. I’m sorry.”
(Why people have to insert the term “I am sorry”?. It make no sense to me. Nobody is sorry, otherwise they should have changed their behavior prior to saying they are sorry)

The post read: “There’s no “That’s how I am.”

There’s how everything around you made you without your awareness.

And there’s how you consciously made yourself. These are the two things that most make you.

I was having a dream.

I’m in a little cabin with a nice lady. A male friend of mine is there too. The lady is standing just outside the door on the porch. My friend is standing a the door, leaning left on his hand.

I’m watching them from inside, the light from outside glows her golden hair, and makes a silhouette of the rest of them.

My friend is telling the lady, just out of nowhere:”Warm Italian spaghetti topped with a lush tomato sauce and a hint of basil. A cold glass of wine, and strawberry cheesecake for a sweet end.”

Her face lights up, “I’m starving!” she replies.  I never did that. Well maybe when I’m asking a girl out the first time. I usually shout out to the girl from one corner of the studio “I’m hungry, you?” That’s not how I am.

That’s how everything around me made me. I can change that. I like the approach of my friend in the dream. I’ll change my habit. I’ve done that countless times. How I am right now is not how I was 10 years ago.

Ten years ago, 80% of me was because of how everything around me made me. Today 80% percent of me is how I consciously made myself. Habit change is all it takes. One tiny habit at a time.

I like today’s me better. You? Twitter @williamchoukeir”  End of quote

Four years ago, I wrote my autobiography, the biography of someone not glamorous or famous, and the last chapter was nature versus nurture, sort of chronological timeline of “What if this didn’t happens…What if I didn’t make that decision…”, would I have been a different person?

You judge, decide, and send me feedback. https://adonis49.wordpress.com/2009/03/06/introspectionnature-versus-nurture-58/


adonis49

adonis49

adonis49

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