Adonis Diaries

Confronted with two options? Decide on third choice: You are better off accepting you own set of pains to pay

Posted on: January 6, 2012

You are told: You have two choices. You are better off creating a third choice for pains to pay

Is life a successive choices for trading in your pain?  Have you been confronted with two obvious choices?  Have you ever reflected and decided that “the third choice” will pays off for the same kinds of pains and suffering you inevitably have to experience?

Seth Godin wrote (with slight editing): “The pain of a lousy boss, of careless mistakes, of insufficient credit. The pain of instability, of bullying, of inadequate tools. The pain of poor cash flow, corrossive feedback and work that isn’t worthy of you. Pain is part of work. And it leads to two mistakes.

The notion that you can trade your way out of pain!

“If I just get a little bigger, a little more famous, a little richer… the pain will go away.” This notion creates a cycle of dissatisfaction, an unwillingness to stick it out. You convince yourself: “There’s always a pain-free gig right around the corner, so screw this, let’s go try that”.

What if pain is everywhere, in every project, in every relationship, and in every job. Don’t you think that “wandering from one association to another merely wastes your energy? You think: “Let me embrace my current pain and thus avoid newer, unknown pains….”

This is precisely the opposite mistake. This leads to paralysis. Falling in love with the pain you’ve got as a way of avoiding unknown future pains gets you stuck, wasting your potential.

As usual, when confronted with two obvious choices, it’s the third choice that pays.” End of quote

Knowing yourself is a process of always trying to figure out the third choice that fit your passions, interests, and well-being.

If pain, suffering, and inconvenience are ultimately inevitable in any endeavour you face, how about you select the sets of pain, suffering, and inconvenience that are of your decisions and of your acceptance?

There are no alternative to serious reflection, unless you tend to go with the wind and the power-to-be as your guiding rod.

What individualism means in that case? What the spirit means in that case? What life means in that case?

You have got to constantly think and create a third choice, your choice. And you can impose your choice: Figure out the proper rationales, and people might be willing to listen and respond accordingly.

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January 2012

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