Adonis Diaries

Not a Hermit: No one wants to pay for taking me out

Posted on: April 23, 2012

Not a Hermit: No one wants to pay for taking me out

I am told and I read of many cases of mid-age persons ending up releasing their old friends from their “sworn life-long allegiance” and being reduced to the forced hermit life.

Like those suffering from the Old Git Complacency Syndrome, who are barricaded in their shed. Family members get calls to speak to the modern hermit, and they had to answer: “He is not to be disturbed. He is in the shed. He could be in Somalia for all we know. Three weeks ago, we saw a satellite dish installed in the shed. Otherwise, we have no evidence that he is alive…” (from Marcus Buckmann)

It is not my case: I never had close friends to call on me or propose to come and give me a lift for a day out or a night out…Why? (I detailed the causes in my Autobiography and Diary categories) 

How can you incorporated in a company of “friends” if You are the silent member, you never learned to swear, could not afford to pay your share, much less pay for the company round of beer…?

I am not a hermit: I do take baths, shave almost every day, change the design of my beard and moustaches, change my underwear and under shirt, love to eat and eat everything available and more, still ogle pretty women, and my body postures demonstrate my constant habit of hitting on pretty women…

I am not a hermit: I like to go hiking, swimming when asked to join the party, going dancing…The problem is no one wants to pay for taking me out…

Summer time is tough: It is suffocating and it never rains once during seven months. How often per day should I change shorts and undershirts to prove that I am no hermit?

Winter time is tough: A tad more manageable than summer hot season, and I don’t have to provide excuses for my hermit situation…

In winter, I have so many pieces of cloths, mostly hand-me-down, though I am the elder of the extended family members…In any case, a decent black long coat covers all, and I am ever ready to join the invitation party…

Strange, most of the invitations are last minutes decisions: “We are leaving in two minutes..” No problem, I am ready.  “But you don’t look presentable…” No problem: I shave in one minute and wear my long coat…And I know the location of the long coat in the overcrowded closet…

My real headache is: “What pair of shoes shall I wear for the occasion?  Hiking, going to wedding, going dancing, going to pay condolences…How oftern shall I keep glueing my shoes for particular occasions?” 

It is not that I am concerned with matching shoes to what I wear: They are falling apart and no replacement pairs are coming forth…

And people keep thinking of books for gifts, and I tell them: “Thanks for the thought. Cash is always welcomed. A comfortable all-weather pair of shoes is ideal…” Unfortunately, my small feet do not match hand-me-down shoes. I tell the women members that their worn out sneakers are fine with me, but they refuse to give them on the ground the shoes look feminine…As if walking discriminates on genders…


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April 2012

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