Adonis Diaries

Posts Tagged ‘ego

Tidbits #69

“J’ ai ecrit un nom tout pres du reseau d’ecume, ou’ la dernière onde vient de mourir; les lames successives ont attaqué lentement le nom consolateur; ce n’est qu’au seizième déroulement qu’elles l’ont emporté lettre a lettre et comme a regret: Je sentais qu’elles effacaient ma vie” (Chateaubriand avait écrit le nom de Mrs. Récamier)

Il ne reste plus qu’une foule de gens qui troublent le monde, une petite tache sur le monde. Peut-être qu’une brise planera quand on passera par le Port de Beirut.

A new reality seems created when we adapt our dreams to the previous reality.

We seek a catchy singing rime, a catchy mantra…to summarize our new found purpose in life.

The Druze sect in Lebanon is in a far worse situation than the various “Christian” sects. The Jews in Israel are working on letting the Druze believe they are Half Jews. The various Muslim sects barely believe the Druze are Half Muslims. They created their own paranoia 800 years ago. They still hang to the illusion that England will come to their rescue in bad periods. No political organization is willing to believe in their “allegiance”, even in the short-term

The problem with the Ego, (and it is real), it’s that we identify with it to the extent that we forget there’s other parts of us. We get lost in certain habitual identities and then we stop looking. So we’re learning to be present with the manifestation.

The pleasure of reading history, (and history is more likely to be biased for the victors), like art or music or literature, consists of an expansion of the experience of being alive, which is what education is largely about. (And to give us ground for daydreaming stories and project?)

“Simplicity is the end result of long, hard work; not the starting point.” — Frederick Maitland. (The relevant question is: How simple is simple and how accurate it still describes the phenomena).

The uprisings of the “Arab Spring” in Tunisia and Egypt have so far produced anarchy in Libya, a civil war in Syria, greater autocracy in Bahrain and resumed dictatorial rule in Egypt.  (All these failures thanks to US/Saudi Kingdom/Israel/France ) who don’t want changes and democracy in the region)

Civil disobedience means you decided to adopt the strategy of confronting the system instead of running away from problems to easier alternatives.

Last night I was watching Hezbollah channel Al Manar. It told of the route the Umayyad army travelled with the “sabayat“, the prisoners of what was left of Hussein army. It said that most of the semi-nomadic tribes living in Syria withdrew with the defeated Byzantine army. It failed to say that the barely 7,000 fighters who came from the desert could Not defeat the Byzantine army if the tribes in Syria didn’t join it. A historical decision to ally with an army with No urban laws and civilization. Humanity civilization degraded as it reverted for 1,500 years to Law and Order based on religious dogmatic concepts and absolute monarchies, both Christian and Muslim.

L’Immortalité de l’âme est un problème attachant pour le genre humain. Si on apprend a concevoir une âme a toutes les autres genres qui vient et pullulent la terre, le racism aurait-il pris racines?

Il faut du courage pour oser braver les cris du vulgaire.

Le dernier moment (de la mort) s’arrête toujours pour nous tromper

Ce n’est que dans l’exile qu’on évoque l’enfance et qu’on essaie de restituer la réalité’ perdue. Pas d’autobiographie sans être exilé dans l’espace et le temps.

“Les idéologues du Christianisme n’ont-ils pas voulu en faire un système d’astronomie?” (Napoleon). En fait, toutes les religions antiques relève d’astronomie, même en ce jour des religions des peuple isolés.

Bonaparte a dérangé jusqu’à l’ avenir. L’esclavage que Napoléon avait façonné la société a l’obéissance passive, et son despotisme descendra sur nous en forteresses.

Live and let live? And the power of Ego?  February 27, 2015

This power that I have a mind of my own?

Believing in one God of several Gods or Demigods who created and organized this universe is not any more difficult to fathom than the myriad of ways people behave, think and reflect as they grow up.

If mankind was so limited in his behaviour, then studying man would have been as straightforward and simple as studying the laws of nature.

All you had to do is to control efficiently and as accurately the few variables we research to affect a particular behaviour.

In all the critical questions such as death, what after death, birth, how we survived the infantile stage and live to long age, how mankind managed to exist, does a God or several exist… the only main factor of interest to each one of us is “And my Ego? Where is my Ego in the equation?”

I should tend carefully and assiduously to the status of my Ego in all your discussions.

Nothing is of value if my Ego was not given its full weight and its vast contribution to mankind and the sustainable activity for a renewable nature.

Isn’t this your main concern?

Even if I died and nobody knew that I died or what I may have contributed to any kinds of community, I still insist that want my Ego in the equation.

And the more incognito I existed, the louder and vociferous I am in matter of life, death, contraception, euthanasia, death sentences, abortion, equal rights to all regardless of equal contribution to humanity

Sciences may unveil a few mysteries, but the mysteries do Not necessarily cease to be miracles.

The highest miracle of all is to have lived long enough to grow to think that I acquired a mind of my own, a set of values of my own, and that I can survive, away from my parents and my close community.

Live and let live means: Never believe that you have the right to be blunt and cruel to disprove an individual that he indeed cannot have a mind of his own.

The lot of the living is a continuous stream of pains, suffering, depression, affliction, in nature “Red in tooth and claws”, and our violent behaviour toward others.

And here is the puzzle:

Either the Gods cannot abolish Evil or they will not.

If God cannot, he is Not all powerful.

If God will not, he is not all that good.

Either God is not all powerful or he is not all goodness.

I tend to side with the statement: God is not that powerful and does not wish it to be.

For all those insisting on the existence of a God by necessity, at least refrain from substituting your abstract concepts of rightfulness when acting or judging the behaviour of others.



Sex: an exclusively personal value (Draft); (Jan. 20, 2010)

Let me dispatch the physical aspect to focus on the important matter.  Like pissing, shitting, and sweating, ejaculating is a bodily excretion.

Like shivering for heat equilibrium, ejaculating is a reaction for internal physical chemical equilibrium.

We learn to control pissing and shitting when asleep with no major harms; we might control these exercises during our waking period for short duration.  I doubt that it is recommended to stretch the control freakishness to ejaculation during the dream part of sleep: your subconscious mind might get frustrated in reorganizing your memory and it needs a release mechanism to function properly.

Thus, set aside any guilt feeling when you have sex in dreams, no matter with whom or with which genders.

I will not dwell on the physical consequences of diseases or how to protect from inadvertent occurrences.  I am interested in the value system attached to sex.

I am not insinuating that sex is the primal value in most social value systems, but it is in most systems.  It is our duty to retrieve sex from the other values and give it an exclusive personal value.  This is right because sex is a prime responsibility that is pretty much under individual capabilities to control and manage.

What differentiate intercourse from the other excretion outlets is that it is under your total control during the waking period, and for as long as you wish, with no major physical harmful consequences.

I also differentiate between sex interplay (without intercourse) and the entire sex game.  Sex interplay should always be welcomed between two friends who appreciate company.

The topic is basically related to the intercourse phaseIt is always trouble in any aspect you consider it (though not necessarily in a negative sense).

When two partners need to have intercourse, they should be at the same psychological level emotionally.

No one is nominee to play the physician or psychiatrist or to be in control during the whole physical debate.

Thus, the partners have to be both  emotionally either “sick” (they feel the urge for release) or contended and healthy (they regard sex as the best alternative quality time).

Intercourse bring the domain of the ego into the foregroundEgo is the most tricky characteristic to comprehend, admit its existence in the relationship, and to control and manage its consequences.

It is your entire responsibility to be sensitive enough to recognize the imbalance in emotional status when you decide to have intercourse.

You have to decide: are you both emotionally sick or healthy?  It is your entire responsibility to figure out in what state your partner is complying. Conversation is an excellent start; exposing your concept for healthy intercourse is a must to permit your partner judicious decisions.

If you are past age 30, you are not entitled to bring the issue of subconscious urge for procreation: you have lived long enough for your brain to discriminate among rational thinking, facts, fiction, myths, misunderstanding, disinformation, and human errors.  The psychiatrist will demonstrate whether you are a nut case at this advanced age.

Intercourse, as a game of complex control behavior of others, is the most basic and influential habit that expands to all other control behaviors in our daily routines and schemes.

If we learn to master the control freak behavior in bed, then humanity would have started a giant step toward harmony, compassion, and emotional stability.

Note:  This is a draft: I need your developed opinions and comments.


Posted on: July 17, 2009



Girls have huge Egos.

An immense Ego that cannot conceive

Of another option

But to raise a bunch of brats

Of one day old to beyond their late fifties.

Compared to man’s Ego

The magnitude is Galactic.

I like to call the Ego of man


Egocentrist: The fake and the real, you decide (February, 18, 2009)

Life covers infinite shades of typicality and values but sending the right message needs two gross examples for comparison sake. 

Let us consider a person who have or made time to spare and he decided to analyze his behavior, pretty much an exercise in introspection.

This process requires reading a lot, reflecting, recalling, and writing on a daily basis; a diary is highly recommended. 

It is a harsh exercise that demands honesty, guts, and stubbornness. The road is uneven and fraught with despair and loneliness and social uneasiness from the neighbors and close relatives. 

Fundamentally, you are categorized as someone who “lost it” or going through middle age troubles and the longer the process of introspection the definitive is the condemnation.

This process does not rule out socializing and having fun and enjoying life to the hilt; the real hic is “are you going to find whom is willing to join you and sharing your happiness”? 

If you are to go out alone and if you are not ready to socialize wherever you are going to, then why the bother of getting out? You know deep down that you are in introspection primarily because you feel the urge to comprehend the others, to discover resemblance in behavior, more compatible associative links than how you used to judge people.

You don’t want to feel an alien in your surrounding. But first thing first, you need cohesive answers to the questions “Who am I? What are my strengths and weaknesses? How can I improve and in what way? What is the value of living? How can I contribute? Do I still count after I am dead?”

Now let us consider the other type of individual

He hates staying still; he is constantly on the road; on weekends he is taking long trips hunting, fishing, skiing, camping, vacationing, touring or whatever. He cannot stand being at home. 

He has to fuss around more than of being of help.

After work he hits the bars to rewind.  He lingers as long as he can to avoid returning home. 

At home he has nothing to do but watch cables.  Fundamentally, he hates anything related to reading, reflecting, discussing, and writing.

At best, he might read professional materials to keep up with his profession. He ingurgitates all kinds of pharmacopoeias in order to keep out of home.  It is always the end of time if he has to be tied down to bed because he has to feed his family, because he has responsibilities, because it is not the time to rest and sleep, because “I will sleep long enough after I die

The introspective person implicitly believes that there is a second return after death and that if he learns to witness a change in kindness toward others and himself then he should be ready and up and running to enjoy what life offers. 

The second individual implicitly do not believe that there is another life; even if there is one then it would be of the same nature of struggle among wills for power and another life of strings of miseries.

My question is “Who is the ego-centrist?” 

Is he the one running away from reflecting on his behavior or the one who decided to take the demon by the horns? 

Who will be more capable of mastering “Time” and taking advantage of his older years

Who will be more capable of showing companionship and relating to people as age advances? 

Who will be the favorite listening ears and the least judgmental with age?

Has your Ego changed in definition? (November 28, 2008)

Sciences have this tendency to fine tune definitions in order to account for variations perceived in social and individual diversities.

The field of psychology has offered at least four definitions for Ego.

  1. You have got the Narcissi Ego when the “I” is wished to be above the common of mortals, an inability to identify with the sufferings of others and which masks our vulnerabilities to death and apprehension of the others.
  2. You have the Hysteric Ego when the “I” depends on the perceptions of the others and the urge to be accepted as the center of the universe.
  3. You have the Egocentric Ego when the “I” would like to be without any reproach and flaw in the view of the moral standards with the consequence of ultimately hating every one who offer a criticism.
  4. You have the Non-Ego or the “Da” in Tibetan or “Atman” in Sanskrit when we should strive to feel like a drop of water in the ocean, an ego not associated to the ephemeris of society but related to nature and the universe (I don’t like it because it lacks the attributes of human beings).

If we consider any extreme emotions as transient insanity for an indeterminate duration (the length of the duration being a science in itself for determining mental dysfunction) then all of us “normal” people have a combination of the four kinds of ego, the proportionality of one kind of ego to the others reflecting the frequency of one ego with respect to the other four, within a day, a week, or a conceptual period of observation.

Maybe when we blame someone for failing to develop or mature in due time, we might unconsciously be blaming him for not transforming his type of “ego combination” into a qualitatively more appropriate combination acceptable by the “normal” society.

I have been observing my behavior for the last seven years, what we call an introspective analysis, by writing and reading a lot.

I think that my ego combinations types started Egocentric, then Narcissi, then Hysteric, then subconsciously drifting toward Atman (out of disgust of myself and the state of affairs in the world) and then finally settling to mostly Hysteric (a state that most of us would like to categorize their Ego, young and old, male and female: it has a gentle connotation of being liberal whether our definition of ego is true or false or the denomination of liberality is true or false).

The point is: if you think that your combination of ego has not changed then you are definitely insane or you have the streak of a trade mark narcissist.

It never hurts to have a heavy dose of one kind of Egomania, as long as you are aware of who you are, proud of your individuality with a tad of compassion and sensibility to people’s sufferings.




March 2023

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