Adonis Diaries

Sex: an exclusively personal value (Draft); (Jan. 20, 2010)

Let me dispatch the physical aspect to focus on the important matter.  Like pissing, shitting, and sweating, ejaculating is a bodily excretion.

Like shivering for heat equilibrium, ejaculating is a reaction for internal physical chemical equilibrium.

We learn to control pissing and shitting when asleep with no major harms; we might control these exercises during our waking period for short duration.  I doubt that it is recommended to stretch the control freakishness to ejaculation during the dream part of sleep: your subconscious mind might get frustrated in reorganizing your memory and it needs a release mechanism to function properly.

Thus, set aside any guilt feeling when you have sex in dreams, no matter with whom or with which genders.

I will not dwell on the physical consequences of diseases or how to protect from inadvertent occurrences.  I am interested in the value system attached to sex.

I am not insinuating that sex is the primal value in most social value systems, but it is in most systems.  It is our duty to retrieve sex from the other values and give it an exclusive personal value.  This is right because sex is a prime responsibility that is pretty much under individual capabilities to control and manage.

What differentiate intercourse from the other excretion outlets is that it is under your total control during the waking period, and for as long as you wish, with no major physical harmful consequences.

I also differentiate between sex interplay (without intercourse) and the entire sex game.  Sex interplay should always be welcomed between two friends who appreciate company.

The topic is basically related to the intercourse phase:  It is always trouble in any aspect you consider it (though not necessarily in a negative sense).

When two partners need to have intercourse, they should be at the same psychological level emotionally.

No one is nominee to play the physician or psychiatrist or to be in control during the whole physical debate.

Thus, the partners have to be both  emotionally either “sick” (they feel the urge for release) or contended and healthy (they regard sex as the best alternative quality time).

Intercourse bring the domain of the ego into the foreground.  Ego is the most tricky characteristic to comprehend, admit its existence in the relationship, and to control and manage its consequences.

It is your entire responsibility to be sensitive enough to recognize the imbalance in emotional status when you decide to have intercourse.

You have to decide: are you both emotionally sick or healthy?  It is your entire responsibility to figure out in what state your partner is complying. Conversation is an excellent start; exposing your concept for healthy intercourse is a must to permit your partner judicious decisions.

If you are past age 30, you are not entitled to bring the issue of subconscious urge for procreation: you have lived long enough for your brain to discriminate among rational thinking, facts, fiction, myths, misunderstanding, disinformation, and human errors.  The psychiatrist will demonstrate whether you are a nut case at this advanced age.

Intercourse, as a game of complex control behavior of others, is the most basic and influential habit that expands to all other control behaviors in our daily routines and schemes.

If we learn to master the control freak behavior in bed, then humanity would have started a giant step toward harmony, compassion, and emotional stability.

Note:  This is a draft: I need your developed opinions and comments.