Adonis Diaries

Posts Tagged ‘rape

How many women and men are needed to convince you of a rape act?

Rape is not sex.

Men don’t rape women because they need to get laid.

Rape is violence. It’s power and dehumanizing of women.

Many wonder why they (this group of men) raped girls while they could have consensual sex, but that’s not the point. They don’t want vanilla: they want violence. They want to humiliate, inflict pain and violate.

They want to take what they want without permission. Because they can.

We tip the nurse at the birth of the boy double the girl.

We say “go make your brother a cup of tea” and allow him to boss his sister around.

We raise our boys to do as they please. To pee in the street because “they can’t hold it”.

To sleep in and get breakfast to his bed instead of helping at home.

We praise his “masculinity” with the amounts of hearts he has broken because “boys will be boys”.

We forgive his fling with the neighbor’s girl because he is a boy while we beat the girl in submission, all her life.

We laugh at the stolen kisses in the staircase priding our “boy has grown” while we curse the girl who gave in.

But she is not ours so we don’t care. She is collateral damage.

We teach him that the girl he touched must be a slut, a sinner and if she has done it with you she must have done it with others.

We tell “our boy” not to cry or show kindness because a real man is tough and angry. We poison him with toxic thoughts and connect his masculinity to the level of hate and control he develops towards women.

We don’t tell him about consent.

When he has an urge it must be stilled. He can’t otherwise because “all men are like that, they are hunters by nature”.

We teach him that sex is something he does to women for his own pleasure only. We call them boys whereas they should be men.

We raise girls to comply. To become the perfect victim.

We teach her that her body is sin and must be hidden.

We teach her that anything is always her fault. She is sin. Her voice is 3awra. We teach her that she is a burden and not worthy of love, not worthy of autonomy over her body and life.

We tell her “all men are like that” when she comes home disrespected and defeated. We tell her “the boy likes you” when he is mean to her.

We tell her “your honor” is a membrane and that her life is worthless without it.

We cut her her genitals so she can be “controlled”, we make her bleed to prove virtue.

We tell her to be silent and do as she is told. We tell her to shrink so she is likable. We tell her to be silent so she can please. We tell her not to laugh too loud, to keep her legs closed, to dress to undress. To be a ghost.

It takes 100 girls to convince you he is a rapist and just 1 guy to convince you she is a slut.

Patriarchy is the reason for violence against women. Patriarchy is actually safeguarded by women. Break the cycle. Step out of it.

Start at the root. Raise your children differently.

Change the laws that enable rape culture and the dehumanizing of women.

Give women equality to men by law and enforce it. We have to stop being a society that hates and fears women so much.

“Women, you are Not to kill your boss for raping you”: Saudi Kingdom relish to execute women for many lame reasons

Outrage As Saudi Kingdom Executes Indonesian Maid For Killing Boss While He Was Raping Her

Mum-of-one, Tuti Tursilawati was executed after she killed her boss who was raping her, and this sparked outrage in Jakarta.

Tuti Tursilawati was killed on Monday in the city of Ta’if, a city in Saudi Kingdom.

The Saudi government failed to warn the maid’s family or consular staff before she was killed, said officials. Her execution has prompted protests from Indonesia.

Indonesian President Joko Widodo called Saudi Arabia’s foreign minister, Adel al-Jubeir, demanding to know why Jakarta had not been informed about Monday’s execution of Tuti Tursilawati.

It was the fourth time in three years that this Wahhabi Saudi Kingdom had failed to notify Jakarta before executing an Indonesian migrant worker.

Ms Tursilawati was executed just a week after Saudi Arabia’s foreign minister al-Jubeir, met his Indonesian counterpart, Retno Marsudi, and Mr Widodo in Jakarta to discuss migrant workers’ rights.

During the meeting, Mr Marsudi emphasised the importance of having a mandatory consular notification before carrying out death penalties.

Amnesty International Indonesia said that Saudi Arabia had damaged diplomatic ties and had behaved unethically following the execution of the mother-of-one.

“No means no” isn’t clear enough: Alternative explanations

“No means no,” and “being unconscious means no,” may seem like a simple enough concept to understand, but apparently it isn’t. So Twitter user Nafisa Ahmed decided to explain it in words that even idiots can understand. Her epic analogy got a lot of attention on Twitter…

She starts…







Get it now? Ahmed’s tweets were received with applaud by other users…




While Ahmed handled the idiots with ease.

But Ahmed seems happy that her tweets go so many people talking, especially men.


You may rape and then kill your daughter, and just be fined half the amount: Saudi Arabia

Saudi preacher, Fayhan Ghamdi, gets fine and short jail term for raping and killing his 5 year-old daughter

Posted on RT this Feb. 3, 2013 (received this link on FB by Andrew Bossone via Arwa Gaballa)

Public anger has gripped Saudi Arabia after a prominent preacher who raped and beat to death his 5-year-old daughter. Fayhan Ghamdi was sentenced to a few months in jail and a $50,000 fine – known as ‘blood money’ – to compensate the victim’s relatives.

­According to Islamic law, the ‘blood money’ can be paid in lieu of the death penalty. The preacher’s fine was reportedly half the usual amount because the victim was a girl.

Saudi preacher Fayhan Ghamdi, a frequent guest on Muslim TV networks, confessed to using cables and a cane to inflict the injuries, AFP reported, quoting activists from the group ‘Women to Drive.’

Ghamdi reportedly doubted that his daughter, Lama Ghamdi, was a virgin, and forced her to undergo a medical inspection.

Image from @We-are-supporting-Manal-Alsharif claims to show Fayhan Ghamdi

Do you care to take a look at this pork? Image from @We-are-supporting-Manal-Alsharif claims that this person is Fayhan Ghamdi

In December 2011, Lama was admitted to hospital with multiple injuries, including a crushed skull, broken ribs and left arm, and extensive bruising and burns, according to the activist group.

Hospital worker Randa Kaleeb said that the girl’s back was broken, and that she had been raped “everywhere.”

Lama al-Ghamdi (Screenshot from Lama al-Ghamdi (Screenshot from

­The hospital told the victim’s mother that her child’s “rectum had been torn open and the abuser had attempted to burn it closed,” AFP reported on Saturday.

In October 2012, the girl died from her injuries.

The following November, the father was arrested. The judge ruled that the blood money and the time the defendant had served in prison since Lama’s death suffices as punishment,” activists reported.

The incident sparked public anger in Saudi Arabia, prompting an online Twitter campaign calling for more severe punishment for violence against women and children.

The ‘Women to Drive’ campaign, launched by women’s rights activist Manal Sharif, has demanded the creation of legislation that would criminalize violence against women and children.

The petition is circulating on Twitter under the hashtag ‘Ana Lama’ – “I am Lama” in Arabic.

The issue has gained widespread traction in Saudi Arabia, and authorities promised to set up a 24-hour hotline that will take calls regarding child abuse.


India systematic raping customs? The Final Straw?

What’s her name? I see a picture of her. Many demonstrations AND outraged condemnations, but no name. Why? A taboo?

Is this raped girl must die incognito in order to preserve whose dignity, whose safety?

She was 23
Her fault she boarded the wrong bus
Six men raped her, indian file, and used an iron rod to tear her vagina-
Small intestine and large intestine came out
They left her to die on the road
What’s more is that no one even turned to look at her
No one even bothered to throw a shawl on the ill-clad
ill-fated girl
She can never live a normal married life again
She Went into coma five times since 16th December
She was unconscious
Critical and hasn’t been able to stop crying
But don’t worry
She wasn’t your sister
She wasn’t your daughter
But she could be.

The brutality has to stop right here guys
These people deserve serious punishment for their cruel,
Perverted act
She died yesterday Saturday 29th
December 2012
Rest in Peace♥

Raping doesn’t only happen in India..
But in every country around the world..
Is this how we treat our women?
It Makes me ashamed to even live on this planet today
If her death Touches u and you are against RAPE
“Write RIP”
If u Support RAPE

Photo: She was 23<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
Her fault some people say because she boarded the wrong bus<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
And oh yeah<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
SHE WAS A GIRL<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
Six men raped her one by one and then used an iron rod to tear her vagina-<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
Small intestine and large intestine came out<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
They left her to die on the road<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
Naked!<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
Wounded!<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
Exposed!<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
Devastated<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
What’s more is that no one even turned to look at her<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
No one even bothered to throw a shawl on the ill-clad<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
ill-fated girl<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
She can never live a normal married life again<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
She Went into coma five times since 16th December<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
She was unconscious<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
Critical and hasn't been able to stop crying<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
But don’t worry<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
She wasn't your sister<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
She wasn't your daughter<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
But she could be. The brutality has to stop right here guys<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
These people deserve capital punishment for their cruel,<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
Perverted act<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
She died yesterday Saturday 29th<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
December 2012<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
Rest in Peace♥ and I pray that her killers get the WORST punishment possible<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
This doesn't only happen in India..<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
But in every country around the world..<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
Is this how we treat our women?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
It Makes me ashamed to even live on this planet today<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
If her death Touches u and you are against RAPE<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
"Write RIP"<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
If u Support RAPE<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />

Emma Ruby-Sachs – of wrote:

A Join massive protests in India, and call on the government to strengthen laws and launch a major public education campaign to challenge and shame the grotesque attitudes that led to this violence:

Sign the petition

She was a physical therapy student who boarded a bus in Delhi last month. Six men locked the door, and savagely raped her for hours, including with a metal rod.

The ringleader of the woman’s rapists coldly says she deserved itbecause she dared to stand up to him.

They dumped her naked in the street, and after bravely fighting for her life, she died last weekend.

Across India, people are responding in massive protests to say enough is enough.

In India a woman is raped every 22 minutes, and few see justice.

Globally, a staggering 7 in 10 women will be physically or sexually abused in their lifetime.

This horror in Delhi is the last straw — it’s 2013, and the brutal, venal, global war on women must stop. We can start by drawing the line in India.

The government is accepting public comments for the next 24 hours.

We urgently need both stronger law enforcement and a massive public education program to change the grotesque but common male attitudes that permit violence against women.

If 1 million of us join the call for action, we can help make this young woman’s horror the last straw, and the beginning of a new hope:

Blaming the victim and other outrageous attitudes are found across society, including in the police system who continually fail to investigate rape.

Such views repress women and corrupt men everywhere.

Massively funded public education campaigns have radically shifted social behaviour on drunk driving and smoking, and can impact the treatment of women.

Tackling the root causes of India’s rape epidemic is vital, alongside better laws and faster legal processes.

Advertising in India is relatively cheap, so a significant funding commitment could blanket airwaves in multiple media markets for a sustained period of time.

The ads should target male subcultures where conservative misogyny thrives, directly challenging and shaming those attitudes, ideally using messengers like popular sports figures that carry authority with the audience.

We have just 1 day to influence the official Commission set up to find ways to crack down on India’s wave of sexual violence. If we can show real success in shifting attitudes in India, the model can be applied to other countries.

The money spent will more than pay for itself by reducing poverty and promoting development, since treatment and empowerment of women has been identified as one of the greatest single drivers of social and economic progress. Click to send a message directly to the Indian government:

From opposing the stoning of women in Iran, to supporting the reproductive rights of women in Morocco, Uzbekistan and Honduras, to lobbying for real action to counter the growing ‘rape trade’ in trafficked women and girls, our community has been on the front lines of the fight to end the war on women. This new year begins with new resolve in India.

With hope and determination,

Emma, Ricken, Luis, Meredith, Iain, Ian, Marie, Michelle, Alaphia, Allison and the rest of the Avaaz team

Read MORE 

India gang-rape: Five suspects charged in Delhi (BBC)

Verma committee flooded with suggestions on rape (News One India)

India’s ‘rape culture’ can be changed: women authors (Hindustan Times)

Activists woe low conviction rate, long trials (Times of India) 

Delhi Gang-Rape Underscores Rising Sexual Violence Against Indian Women (IB Times) 

Rise in rapes across India (ZeeNews)

70% of women experience physical or sexual violence in their lifetime (UN report)

“Lolita” by Vladimir Nabokov

I don’t recall when I first heard of “Lolita”.

One day, during my frequent visits to Barnes and Nobles in Montgomery County, I stumbled on the book “Lolita”.

Barnes and Nobles didn’t make it a comfortable place for people like me who could not afford to buy books, or the delicious pastries in the adjacent coffee shop, you go in from a door in the megabookstore.

It was hard to find a comfortable chair or table to read, and I sat on the floor.

I attended the talks of authors invited to publicize their recent books, sold at the store, in a corner, a dozen chairs set up for the audience…

Even at an advanced age, I felt uneasy to be discovered reading “Lolita”, and I am a slow reader, and I had to hurry to read as much as I could…I didn’t get the story: Just glimpses of what to expect…

Ten years later, I stumbled on the movie, in black and white, on one of the TV channels. I understood the story, and missed the interesting and most valuable treasures in the book…

And here I am, comprehending “Lolita” via “Reading Lolita in Teheran” by Azar Nafisi.

Basically, I am reviewing this book through the eyes, sensitivity, and comprehension of Nafisi…

Humbert Humbert is writing from jail on a murder charge, and not of the terrible harms he committed on Lolita…

Humbert is travelling and teaching literature in universities, maybe on sabbatical…He has an unfulfilled young love in Annabel Leigh.

At one of his sabbatical, he lands as a tenant at Charlotte Haze’s and rent a room. Charlotte is a bereaved middle-aged widow, and she suffered the loss of her 2-year old boy, and she has a 12-year old daughter Dolores or Dolly (Spanish for pain).

Charlotte marries Humbert and he treat her badly, as a faked southern cultured woman…The movie gave me the impression that Humbert planned the death of Charlotte…

Humbert arrives at Lolita’s summer camp to pick her up as her guardian father, and didn’t attempt to tell her the purpose of the visit. Nabokov writes on this visit of Humbert:

“Let me retain for a moment that scene…hog Holmes writing out a receipt, scratching Lolita’s head, pulling a drawer out of her desk, pouring change into my impatient palm, neatly spreading a banknote over it…photographs of girl-children, some gaudy moth or butterfly, still half- alive, safely pinned to the wall (nature study), the framed diploma of the camp’s dietitian, my trembling hands, a card produced by efficient Holmes with report of Dolly Haze’s behavior for July “fair to good, keen on swimming and boating”. a sound of trees and birds, and my pounding heart…

I am standing with my back to the open door, and I felt the blood rush to my head as I heard her respiration and voice behind me…”

This scene is the prelude to two years of captivity, during which the unwitting Lolita drifts from one motel to another with her guardian-lover. Humbert prevents Lolita to mix with children her age, watches over her so she never has boyfriends, frightens her into secrecy, bribes her with money for act of sex…

And all the while, Humbert parades as a normal husband, normal stepfather, normal human being

Humbert selected Lolita, Lo, or Lola for Dolly. She was Lolita when she sobbed on nights he had his ways with her. He tried all kinds of tricks to get in Lolita’s pants, drugging her, promising plenty of money and never delivering on his promises, threatening her and a few times beating her… As Humbert wrote: “She had absolutely nowhere else to go

The very first painful night, Lolita demands some money to call her mother. Humbert answers: “You can’t call your mother. She is dead” And in the middle of the night, Lolita came sobbing into Humbert’s bed, and “we made it up very gently. You see, she had absolutely nowhere else to go”

Humbert wrote: “What I had madly possessed was not she, but my own creation, another fanciful Lolita, more real than Lolita…Having no will, no consciousness, indeed no real life of her own…”

But Dolly had a past, and she is in lack of her mother and her brother and a steady place to live and friends…

Humbert turned Dolly into a reincarnation of his lost unfulfilled young love…

Nabokov tells on Lolita through Humbert, an imaginary past…Humbert is solipsizing Lolita, attempting to orphan the child for a third time by robbing her of her past, a figment in someone else’s dream.

Lolita’s truth, desires, life…must lose colors before Humbert’s one obsession of turning a kid into his mistress.

A half-living butterfly, fixed on a wall…This perverse intimacy of victim and jailer.

Humbert is exonerating his terrible actions by implicating the victim: “It was she who seduced me…Not a trace of modesty did I perceive in this beautiful badly formed young girl whom modern co-education, juvenile mores, the campfire racket…had utterly depraved. She saw the stark act merely as part of a youngster’s future world, unknown to others…”

Or in other paragraphs: “the vile slut, her obscene young legs (sitting on his lap), engrossed in the lighter section of a newspaper, indifferent to my ecstasy, as if it were something she sat upon, a shoe, a doll, the handle of a tennis racket…”

Policemen, Rape, Tunisia, Girl on trial, Indecent exposure…

A 27-year old Tunisian woman was raped by policemen and could now face charges of indecency and months in jail.

On a recent night, two policemen raped a Tunisian woman repeatedly in her car and when they were caught, accused her of indecency! 

The woman and her fiance were driving back from dinner when the police stopped them.  One officer took the woman’s fiancé to an ATM to rob him, while the other two raped her. When the couple complained, the police alleged that the couple were found in an “immoral position,” a charge they both deny and that was blatantly invented by her rapists to cover up their crime. To make matters worse, the Minister of Justice has denied that the charges against the woman were even made.

But if we raise our voices, we can save her from detention and pave the way for stronger protection of women’s rights in Tunisia.

Dalia Hashad posted on

Dear friends across the Middle East and North Africa,

Now she could face months in jail unless we act immediately to demand the magistrate deny these outrageous charges and insist on stronger protection of women’s rights in Tunisia.

The Tunisian president has now issued an official state apology to the woman. The Magistrate beg to differ: is still considering “indecency” charges against her.

If we build massive pressure now and show the Tunisian government that this case is being watched closely by the entire region, we can shame the Magistrate to dropping this case. 

Any day now, the Magistrate will make a decision, so if thousands of us raise our voices, we can tip the balance and help ensure that state institutions stop the flagrant abuse. Click below to sign the urgent petition and share with everyone — when 10,000 people have signed, we’ll organize a major media stunt outside the Supreme Court in Tunis:

Tunisia has historically supported women’s rights, but the new government has gone backwards.  An article has even been proposed in the draft constitution calling women ‘complementary’ to men, meaning unequal.

In a country where the female literacy rate of greater than 70% is the highest of any in North Africa, women can’t afford to lose vital government protection. 

The birth place of the Arab spring, Tunisia potentially has a bright future ahead of it and ideally the country will develop a fully independent judiciary that upholds the rule of law.

During this transitional period, there is still too much political influence over the court system. We need to ensure the magistrate here heeds the call of the world to exercise the highest calling of the judiciary: justice.

The 27-year old Tunisian woman who suffered through this monstrous experience will carry it with her the rest of her life, let’s show her she’s not alone. 

Activists across the globe have been protesting the Tunisian government’s backpedaling on women’s rights, and now is our chance to join them.

Together, the Avaaz community has fought to protect an Iranian woman from execution and delivered thousands of signatures to the Moroccan government for stronger women’s rights. Now, let’s bring our people-power to Tunisia to demand justice for women.

Dalia, Rewan, Bissan, Ian, Ricken, Mais and the entire Avaaz team

Note 1

Note 2: For more information:

Outrage in Tunisia after woman raped by police is accused of indecency

President issues ‘state apology’ in Tunisia police rape case (CNN) 

Tunis judge questions raped woman over indecency claims 

Police Rape Victim Interview on IWPR 

Tunisia: Protesters support woman in rape case (NY Times) 

A rape case in Tunisia puts the legal system on trial

 published in The National on Oct 2, 2012:

“This morning in Tunis, hundreds of activists will gather in front of a courthouse to protest. Inside the courthouse a woman and her fiance stand accused of indecency, and already two policemen already in jail on charges of raping her.

And the State of Tunisia today sees fit to judge the raped girl. That’s how activists see it.

And, despite the provocative campaign they have run, using the accusatory slogan “Rape her, then Judge her”, the implications of the case are troubling, both for how the law is applied and for gender equality in post-revolution Tunisia.

The woman, who has asked the media not to use her name, was with her fiance in a car in a Tunis suburb early last month when three police officers stopped them. According to the woman’s account, the man was then handcuffed, while she was taken to the back seat of the police car and raped by two of the officers.

She subsequently filed charges and the two policemen have been arrested and now face trial. Activists say the case is unique in Tunisia because it marks the first time a victim of rape by the police has taken the case to court.

But at the end of last month, the couple were themselves also arrested on charges of “indecency”, accused by the officers of being found in an “immoral” position when they first stopped the car.

Many Tunisians have reacted furiously, arguing that the charges are a clear attempt at intimidation.

A group of NGOs released a statement saying the case “transforms the victim into the accused” and arguing that the charge was “designed to frighten and to force the raped woman and her fiance to waive their rights”. Subsequent protests and developments in the case have been widely followed in Tunisia and abroad.

The Ministry of Interior has said the charges were brought by the magistrate, thus exonerating the government of any involvement. But the Tunisian activist Lina Ben Mhenni argues that the ministry, by giving a press conference detailing the charges, tried to “manipulate public opinion and make them forget the real scandal – the rape – by arguing that the victim and her fiance were in an indecent posture when they were arrested”.

The case reconvenes in Tunis today, and the judge is expected to rule on whether to proceed. The right course of action is clear – there is no public interest in prosecuting the couple. They should be set free.

At the root of this case is a narrow question of the law, and a larger question of the public interest. It is the court’s duty to consider both.

The first question is whether the couple did something illegal.

Others have argued that there should be no law in Tunisia which criminalize “indecency”. That is one point of view, but a point for lawmakers and politicians. The courts merely interpret the law, and in this case prosecutors have decided that there is evidence of a crime.

But there is also a wider question and context.

This case is part of what is happening – legally, politically and socially – in post-revolution Tunisia.

Although the law stands above everyone, courts do not stand apart from society. Ultimately, courts must balance the facts of the case with whether a prosecution is required in the public interest. In this case, clearly, the prosecution deters other women from coming forward.

The social context in this case matters. There are concerns among Tunisians that, as the country moves to write a constitution and prepares for elections next year, the power of the Islamist majority is being felt widely.

Feminists have complained that police harass women over their clothing, an accusation keenly felt in a society where many fear the social freedoms gained over the past few decades could be reversed.




March 2023

Blog Stats

  • 1,518,904 hits

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by

Join 764 other subscribers
%d bloggers like this: