Adonis Diaries

Posts Tagged ‘smoker

Addiction must be dissociated from the notion of Habit

Last night I had this conversation with myself.

For the dialogue to get interesting, I opted to be talking with an imaginary beautiful and thoughtful woman.

It’s cold and I decided to get in bed early.  I’m not sleepy and weaved this conversation.

I have realized lately that waking up in the morning requires from me too much work and determination: I don’t want to get up from my warm bed and face another day loaded with the same activities and chores, with no open horizon to dream of.

I wouldn’t mind staying in bed until I feel bored from bed. And I reached a tacit understanding with mother Not to wake me up before 8: 30 am, as the sun is shining and the weather is warmer.

It is supposed to be winter, but this year is as sunny as summer time, but dry and cold by the evening. For my conversation, I invented a situation where I could afford to hire a beautiful and energetic helper.

She is to be good in mechanics and electricity and an excellent handy woman and drives safely. I’m thinking: “I’ll suggest to my soft spoken helper to give me in order to wake up a vigorous rub over the bed cover and ruffle thoroughly my hair, listening to a calm classical music and my helper whispering: “All the people you will be meeting with today are gentle person, they have an acute sense of humor and are very compassionate types…”

The day comes when she blurted out: “I feel that you no longer mind waking up” The irony was not lost on me and I replied: “The new process of waking up has turned up to be efficient”

She said: “Habits are the secrets to what we like, can suffer, and are

I suggested: “May be it is the idea that we like a certain habit that makes it endearing”

She retorted softly: “We have no conscious idea how we build a habit, and when we realize that it has become a habit, we start to imagine all kinds of advantageous excuses and reasons for sticking to the habit”

I tend to agree with her statement, but I wanted to linger in that conversation and said: “I’m a smoker and I recall that the first time I tried a cigarette, it had the nastiest taste I could imagine. Go figure. I didn’t like the cigarette, but I might have liked the idea that “cool people around me are smokers

She said: “In my mind, habit has a good connotation, like hard working, perseverance, consistency, compassionate, tending to details…These kinds of good habits”

She resumed with some vehemence: “It is a shame that we attach the notion of habit to addiction. A good writer should confront this linkage and association and invent new words and terms more suited to addiction and conserve the good connotation of habit.”

I admit that we live out of sets of habits and we are what our habits are. Addiction should be a subsidiary factor that may define who we are.




December 2022

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