Adonis Diaries

Posts Tagged ‘The Seagull

Summer Night of the Iguana (February 25, 2009)


            “You need to believe in at least a single idea or in a person; at any price.  You have to keep the search for some kind of certitude” This is the gist of what Tennessee Williams was trying to convey in his play “The night of the Iguana” Fred keeps fishing and returning the fishes back to the river. Hanna keeps painting portraits and her grandfather keeps reciting poems for subsistence. Pedro and Poncho catch an iguana; they tie it for the night to have it for breakfast; the iguana keeps screaming all night long. The problem with all these characters is that their search horizon for certainty is pretty limited. A few of us take the easy way out in our restricted environment and substitute individual certitude with social paradigms. We want to find our particular meaning in this life but we lack enough temerity to widen our compass and dare to try anything different of what we learned or practiced.


            The same situations and conditions are experienced with the characters of Anton Chekhov in the play “The Seagull”.  Despair, comfort in a condition, and narrow mindedness are fair signs that we are implicitly searching for certitude but are doing nothing or acting explicitly toward what might give a meaning to our lives.  It seems that the ending of summer brings the worst in us; we longed for a change during a season of potentials but failed to work out a small resolution, the first step in the thousand step journey.


            Many modern professionals are zip jet setters, they zip through life as if they are zipping cable channels; they attend quick conferences and return as quickly to nurse jet lags.  Some of the smarter professionals love their jobs, wake up early and sleep soundly.  A few discover the joy of gardening a plot or even read books out of their discipline.  Most of them refuse to return email messages from the non professionals: they might slip a word that is not up to standard BEHAVIOR.


            I have been in the morass of finding any kinds of certainty all my life and I am still searching.  Heck, I don’t care for this stupid certainty; nothing is certain and that is the rollercoaster fun of life.  All I want is doing something that interests me within my financial difficulty. I enlarged my compass far and in many directions; I studied various disciplines, I worked in almost all jobs, I fought alone and in a group, and I even tried artistic and musical skills that I knew I could not have.  I am in dire financial condition but it does not phase me. I keep at reading, reflecting, writing, and publishing.  I barely miss a free opportunity to discover, learn, analyze, synthesize, and comprehend the mysteries of life. 


The only certitude I could arrive at is that the meaning of life is a personal hard work reflection on your own reality, your potentials, and how to develop your capabilities.  It seems that philosophies and religions are too abstract, too limiting, or too biased.  Those who are paid to interpret all these abstract notions are bad liars; their hypocrisy shines like the sun at noon.




February 2023

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