Adonis Diaries

Single precondition for friendship

Can you imagine befriending anyone (regardless of genders or domestic animal) if you feel disgusted physically or behaviorally by the other partner?

We have 5 senses that need to be satisfied with close bodily contacts.

If the smell of smoking generates vomiting instincts, can you befriend an addicted smoking person?

If your partner suffocate your nose with body smell, or exhaling noxious mouth breath, or you feel disoriented with which eye is the valid one, or…

If one of your senses feels revolted by the close contact of someone, how could you “sustain” and maintain the friendship?

Unless you are of the type of “re-educating” the partner, for some mysterious reasons.

Suppose that you had “remote agreeable communication” with someone, and you physically met with the remote individual.  You are turned off physically or behaviorally from this person.  Don’t you think that your further remote communication would be laced with “aggressive undertone“?

The next time you engage a remote communication with the “previous remote friend” will be biased negatively, you will find the logic asynchronous, ideas outdated, opinion not frank and honest…

You don’t have to bemoan that you never graduated from diplomatic foreign affairs schools:  Just be upfront and say: “Sir, it is a sort of physical or behavioral repulsion.  I think it is best that we never mention our names in further remote communication… Since I know your writing style, don’t expect me to comments on your pieces or to dwell on extensive analyses…”

I don’t think you have to rub it deeper with the second sentence:  The first blunt sentence will do the job wonderfully. Anyway, there are plenty of social platforms and plenty of bloggers…

It is funny these repeat scenes in movies where someone is drawing a list of pro and con qualities on the partner, and they are wondering how come the friendship lasted that long…

Let us be frank, the precondition for friendship was solid and stable for the duration:  the check list is a benign exercise,  lest the check list is a precursor for a drastic decision of change in venue…

Have you been friend with someone for a long time, and you feel the friendship is now irrelevant, pretty much redundant..?

You make a long laundry list of all the valid differences to convince yourself that there must be a good reason for the break-down in relationship.  You realize that these difference existed and you knew all about them all along, but why you’re feeling that way just right now?

You know that the list of variations in physical or behavioral differences is a crappy excuse:  You know deep down that one of your senses was hugely attracted to your friend, assuming that all the remaining characteristics in your friend were just normal and acceptable.

What changed is that your particular sense has been blunted by age and the valuing scale has be transformed. Or most probably, you want to believe that the attractive part in your friend has changed to the worse.

For example, your friend is involuntarily farting, the smell of his hair has turned vinegar, the skin is showing signs of lost hope in perpetual youth and vigor…These kinds of deficiencies produced by aging…but you refuse to admit that it was these insignificant bestial senses that were the cause for starting the friendship adventure, and the catalyst for the demise of the friendship, vanishing into thin air…

The aging process requires some kind of solitude, of larger needs for more privacy, and of hiding growing deficiencies…

Am I brutal? Isn’t it the power and beauty of having a blog?